It is the morning after picking SuperStar up from camp. I got the privilege (yea me). Spidey and TO came with us. TO had spent the night and we were meeting MO since CO had gone to camp with SuperStar. We got there before they opened the gates again - just like so many other parents whose daughters had been there for 6 days and they were missing them like crazy. Funny how that work - I don't remember all those parents sitting there early to drop their girls off. We are never in a hurry to rush them off. As we waited Spidey and TO leaned on each other - sat on each other - discussed the benefits of Carmex - told some butt jokes - typical. Cute. They also discussed the song I Make The Good Girls Go Bad - whole other blog and HILARIOUS!
But nothing was really stirring in my head other then - we are here to pick up SuperStar - then lunch at camp - then my appointment - then packing - then school supplies - then dinner - then...........the gates opened.
We parked - we grabbed the two tents we were donating - we stood in line to check in - I did not even need an ID to prove who I am I am such a Girl Scout junkie - Bugs the director told Tippy the counselor checking in that I don't need one - because I am one of the SuperStar leaders (funny she would use that term). Really I am just a volunteer-a-holic, but CB would say sweet things like Bugs did (thanks CB - that comp you gave the other day really made my day).
Back to camp.
We walked back to where the girls were behind the lodge. I walked with one of my friends who is one of the scouts parents, MB. We heard them singing. They learn literally a MILLION songs and SuperStar will be singing them for weeks and weeks. We rounded and saw all the parents gathering around the girls listening, clapping, laughing..........and I stood with the boys (who were bumping into each other and watching for their sisters).............and looked - then all of a sudden they were both on top of me - mist from the crowd. Both SuperStar and CO were hugging me and saying how much fun they had........how I just HAD to meet Critter and I just HAD to see the lanyard weaving they learned.........how they had the greatest time ever and how they cried all night the night before because they were so sad to leave. And I teared up. I was so proud. I am tearing up now thinking about it.
She wasn't a little girl anymore. She had made these big girl friends without me. She hugged me and said, "I missed you so much and I loved being at camp - thanks for helping with the cookie sales." and I knew she meant it. She lead me from one counselor to another and I watched as she talked to them like a friend, mentor and an adult. She had created these really tight bonds with these women and these girls - these role models - these people she hopes to see again and hopes to be like - she created memories and experiences that I am not a part of and I will not have a memory of - and I don't get an inch of it. It is all hers. And it kills me and at the same time I know it has to happen - and I am soo soo soo soo proud of her.
She just felt confident.
She felt alive.
She was proud of herself.
She was growing up in front of me.
She is a SuperStar - owns the moniker 100%.
2 comments:
ughhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
That's exactly what I want and what I can feel happening. It's what we do right??
and I'm sitting here crying because I totally get it. And I'm so happy and sad for you all at once. *hugs*
I knew you would get it. I was bawling at home later that day. Too fast - I am choking up just thinking about how I felt that day. Sheesh.
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