The Week of Chicago

We weren't IN Chicago for a week (we would not be able to afford the hotel bill), but I was thinking we would talk about it for a week so that I wasn't cramming EVERYTHING into one post (and also allowing myself a longer stretch of content to make a daily blog last a week). This works for me so that I can try to make less typos and not shorten stories - or perhaps make short stories seem longer. Who knows - I am still tired from all the walking (so this may not make any sense at all) - which was one of my favorite things about Chicago (not the Not Making Sense part, but the Not needing a car part).

So for the next week we will talk about:
* The Train
* The Hotel (gross)
* The Walking
* The Museums (we hit 3)
* The Zoo
* Lincoln Park (because I could live there - BigGuy said this outloud too)
* The People
* The solidarity TheKing found
* The Public Transit (very cool)

Hmmmmm......that is 9.......can a week last 9 days? Let's see......maybe we will skip "The People" since you can find people everywhere you go and no one stands out much".

Tia Maria Sopapia

Not very long ago our kitty passed. Tia Maria Sopapia. No, her name wasn't really meant to be anything that made sense in Spanish. It just rhymed. Although, as she got older she did kinda act like an Aunt Tia.

It has been two weeks since she passed. Talking about it isn't very fun, but she has been part of my family longer then BigGuy has. Tia was just at 17 years - old give or take a month. She lived through my single days, BigGuy and our first apartment, our first house, our second house, our first, second and third kids (I don't think these were her favorite transitions - but she learned to snuggle them) and our third house. She was a sweetie and will be forever remembered.

Quickie

Here is a funny I found on another blog - June Cleaver After a Six-Pack - she is fun to read.

This is a quickie story. The other day - after much much rain - we (All the children and I) are doing some errands. The weather had cleared up, but there was still rain all over the ground. In the form of those big ole puddles that are absolutely and undeniably irresistible to children (and some twisted adults - no finger pointing, but you know who you are).

We are all walking from the car to the store. TheKing stomps into a puddle that I wasn't paying attention to - because I was distracted by Spidey who is nonchalantly walking IN FRONT of an oncoming car. This is an ongoing difficulty with him. BigGuy hardly loses his temper, but on many occasions I see him about swipe Spidey across the back of the head in frustration that Spidey will just wander into the row in a parking lot. Unattended (I was holding TheKing's hand, just not paying attention to where he was leading me) TheKing was able to guide me directly into the center of a puddle. Fortunately he didn't have the sense most children to to JUMP hard and make it splash. Still..........I did my best to reprimand TheKing for doing what every other kids does each time there is a puddle. Although I will admit that the puddle was almost unavoidable it was so big. And we went into the store.

Where I was tortured for as long as it took to find and purchase all the items on our list.

Back into the parking lot. This time I told Spidey to walk directly BEHIND me so that he wasn't to either side, I could hold TheKing's hand and still hold the bag (no need for a cart this trip). There was that inescapable puddle. Right there. We could only avoid it if we very carefully walked through the tiny peninsula of concrete. Which I was doing with TheKing - trying to make it a game of skill - "can you make it around the giant monster puddle without getting wet? don't let it get you sweetie."

SPLASH!!!

Remember Spidey - who was standing directly behind me to make certain he wasn't hit by a car. I had him there for HIS safety. What a mistake that was. My whole back end was soaked. I do believe that as soon as he did it he realized his mistake. As I turned his face contorted into a look that I have only seen in the Gay Hobbit movies on the little elves who are about to be conquered by the giant ogre elves. And he was right to look like that.

Next time I am going to let him take his chances with cars. I do believe it is far safer for both of us.

The Racism Conveyor Belt - Where are you standing?

So last month was Black History Month - as you know I focused on White Privilege. There, of course, was a mixture of things that define what White Privilege is and also some touches on racism in our society today. Also - I said it was my focus for the Month. Wel...........sorta that was a lie.........it isn't my focus for the month - it is my focus for the life of my children who are peach, tannish and brown like yummy chocolate (these are their self designated colors). It is just as important for my "brown like yummy chocolate" child to be able to interpret and navigate through racism and white privilege as it will be for my "peach" and "tannish" children to interpret and navigate through racism. All three will experience various situations through out their lifetimes - as the perpetrators as well as the victims. On top of that - it is important for BigGuy and I to continue to better our own knowledge and lives - identify what we can do better - how we can respond more responsibly - and how we can help to educate others instead of just excuse minor indiscretions (on our part and others) and "not intended mistakes". We owe that to our kids, our family and the world (dorky and dramatic - but absolutely true).

In that regard I want to share a book I have been reading - "Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria? And Other Conversations About Race" by Beverly Daniel Tatum, PH.D.

I picked this book up last month on Valentines Day. Our fam spent part of the day at the bookstore picking out our Valentine gifts - books. Yes we really are that totally cool - deal with it. Now, if my memory serves me (because I am too lazy to go back to look) I mentioned this book last month. It was my intent to copy a passage of this book for you at the end of the month. And while some would say I got distracted, ran out of time, or just didn't get to it - I am going to say that I decided that March was a better month to do my finale for February. That is more empowering then to agree with the above thoughts you all had (shame on you).

So here it is - copied directly - I get no credit for this - except I do get credit for sharing it - it is a wonderful way to rate yourself on the racism scale -

"I sometimes visualize the ongoing cycle of racism as a moving walkway at the airport. Active racist behavior is equivalent to walking fast on the conveyor belt. The person engaged in active racist behavior has identified with the ideology of White supremacy and is moving with it. Passive racist behavior is equivalent to standing still on the walkway. No overt effort is being made, but the conveyor belt moves the bystanders along to the same destination as those who are actively walking. Some of the bystanders may feel the motion of the conveyor belt, see the active racists ahead of them, and choose to turn around, unwilling to go to the same destination as the White supremacists. But unless they are walking actively in the opposite direction at a speed faster than the conveyor belt - unless they are actively anti racist - they will find themselves carried along with the others."

"So, not all Whites are actively racist. Many are passively racist. Some, though not enough, are actively anti racist. The relevant question is not whether all Whites are racist, but how we can move more White people from a position of active or passive racism to one of active anti racism? The task of interrupting racism is obviously not the task of Whites alone. But the fact of White privilege means that White have greater access tot he societal institutions in need of transformation. To whom much is given, much is required."

I LOVE that last sentence - To Whom Much Is Given, Much Is Required

Where are you on the racism conveyor belt? Honestly? Where do you want to be? What needs to happen to get you there?

BigGuy is a SpringBreak Treat

No, not like a treat for me - although that sounds fun, maybe we can put the kids to bed early and duct tape their doors so no one can come out and interrupt a BigGuy Spring Break Treat for me. And now that we are on the topic - what is with the radar kids have? There are 3 things my kids can detect without any physical sounds or signals -
* Talking on the telephone - I can hide in the laundry room - make the call myself so there is NO RINGING - and then hide under the car, in the dark, in the garage and STILL my kids can find me to ask for something that could wait another 3 weeks to be answered.
* Reading a book - my children can be gone for hours and still if I sit somewhere comfortably and begin to read a book they will pop up to either talk to me - or worse yet, sit next to me reading their own book. The second one doesn't sound so intrusive to you? In fact, it sounds sweet and snuggly? Yeah, you would think - only Spidey will be reading out loud to me even if I ask him to read to himself - and SuperStar will be laughing at all the things in her book and tell me about them explaining all the things I don't really need to know since I AM READING MY OWN BOOK - and let's face it, TheKing demands to be read to. Since I am a good parent, I close my book and read with them.
*Getting a Special Treat with BigGuy - and I mean the kind that you have to close the door for - well, now close the door, lock it, turn all the lights out so it looks like no one is in there, then go into the bathroom and turn on the shower - still needing to leave cookies and candy on the landing so they get distracted and never make it up the staircase to detect that we are doing something kind of a Treat. I am so looking forward to the day that we don't have to listen while having a Treat. If the door is locked there is the pounding "What are you doing in there?" Even at night - hours after they have gone to bed - we can't sneak a Treat without them popping up, "I can't sleep. Can I get in bed with you?" I am almost looking forward to the day that they can put 1+1 together and it grosses them out so much that they won't go anywhere near the house while we are having a Treat.

But this blog is about BigGuy being a Spring Break Treat that is family friendly. Here in our corner of the world EVERYONE and their Step-Brother goes out of town for Spring Break. Which kinda stinks for them right now because there is a burglar on the lose in our neighborhood - he was just spotted this morning peeping in another window (so I went around to all my friends houses and checked back doors). However, the people it most stinks for is us. They are gone - we are here. No one to play with. So we make our own fun.

"Hey kids how about we go visit Daddy at work today and eat in the cafeteria with him?" Thinking in my head that this must sound completely lame to them - but please let them agree because we have to get out of the house before they drive each other mad.

"Oh that is so cool!!" and they scramble for their shoes.

And that was today's Spring Break Treat - lunch at work with Dad and seeing his cubicle and hanging out with SpongeBobBen his cubbie neighbor who has all sorts of SpongeBob items displayed. Just for good measure we threw in the Library for books and a trip to get some slip on shoes that fit for outdoor trampoline jumping.

Oh the Excitement here in the Little Corner of our world!! Call now to book your trip!

Welcome to the World

Baby L was born this past Monday. In fact, today he will be 1 week old!! Happy 1 Week Bday BabyL. Now..........BabyL has the distinction of being the Very First of the next Generation in my family. He is my sisters first Grand Child, my first Great Nephew - my parents first Great Grandchild and I guess my nephews first nephew!

Another interesting fact about him - he doesn't look like us yet!! Usually our kids look a great deal like us. BabyL's mom looks like us - in fact, she looks JUST LIKE SuperStar (or since she is 8 years older I guess SuperStar looks like her). Sorry GranmaR - I know how you like to claim the babies for our own, but this one is not there yet - maybe one of his ears look like ours? (my mom is really good at matching up whose ear looks like whose ear - seriously - I have two different ears - one from each family I have been told).

Still.....regardless of who he looks like he is a perfectly gorgeous beautiful baby. So sweet!!


This pic is BabyL and his mom, my baby niece Mags. I believe she is exactly my mothers age when she had me. She was very sweet watching her baby. Very much a first time mom too. Has things set the way she wants them. Not much interest in taking suggestions from a Mother Hen (me, because I feel like her mom too) who is still raising babies. In fairness though - if I remember right I wasn't interested in others opinions either - until the second child that is - then I was up for whatever time, money and sanity saving tip any stranger off the street had to give me.

Yesterday we went up to visit, give gifts, drop off some homecooked meals and sweet breads and just hang out a bit. It was a full day in the car with a little bit of Baby Snuggle Heaven in between. I love holding our babies (don't want one though - just in case higher powers are paying attention - no baby here thank you - just give me a 5 yr. old) Here is my other favorite picture from yesterday.


My baby holding a baby and looking in love. They are both so beautiful....ack! though - too much future in that picture - lucky for me she was rolling around on the floor a few minutes later claiming how bored she was..........

Nothing Like STL

Well, the title isn't completely acurate - there are some similarities to STL - there was a break in in the neighborhood. Another similarity would be the WAY the person broke in - that was pretty common in our old neighborhood too.

Guy goes to front door - knocks - no one is home - goes around to the backdoor - breaks into the house.

The difference - here there is ALWAYS someone walking their dog, standing outside, working from home, noticing that something is amiss. Well.........wait....that is kinda the same as in our old area too. Hmmm........

Well, today when it happened to the family across the street (in exactly the same fashion I described) another neighbor was outside in his front yard getting ready to walk the dog or smoke a cigarette (this neighborhood is often doing both) - and he noticed the stranger on the porch of the neighbor across the street from us. The stranger was not known, the neighbor is good friends with family across the street. He walked down to see what was going on and noticed the stranger walk to the back of the house - the neighbor phoned the police and the person who lived in the house - the police came within a few minutes, just behind the neighbor. The police in STL sometimes took longer, but usually it was a helpful neighbor who tipped everyone off.

The rest of the day was spent watching. And this is where I found things to be different. I watched the neighbors walk around outside - neighbors stop to "check in" on what was happening. People hugged and commiserated over what had happened. People brought brownies! Neighbors sent emails talking about what happened - what next - what to do to protect themselves.

It has been a long time since our house was broken into. It was two houses ago. There is some difference. We did not have neighbors come by to check in on us. We didn't have anyone phone to spread the word. The police didn't hang out for a long time. They didn't bring dogs in to track the person who did the breaking in. Yet the feeling of unrest, being volunerable and violated did come back.

Yet, now that I think of it - it is exactly the same as STL. May happen a lot less here - in our last area it was probably once a week someone was broken into (keep in mind it was a city neighborhood with dense population) - yet a break in is a break in - a violation of your privacy - it is an awful feeling - even if it happens less here, it still happens. Doesn't matter where you live. Same here as in STL.

Guess Who's Back.....

Sunny!! Forgot to mention that Sunny came home the end of February. There was so much going on at once I am just now catching up. Why the pic of her licking her lips? Well, this photo was taken within a few minutes of her being dropped off. As her mom and I talked in the garage she was inside eating the cake that was on the counter cooling! I kid you not - totally let it slip my mind what a dessert lover she was. Most likely she was thinking, "Hey, she baked a cake to welcome me back!!"

We have since been very careful about leaving things out. Sunny has also been very polite about sniffing things before taking them - which gives us more time to tell her to step back - until this morning - she decided to help herself to some Cocoa Roo's.........chocolate tends to be everyone's down fall.

Maybe It's Me.......but I find this Damn Funny!

So the other day I am talking to the kiddo's about this and that. Acronyms come up. You know - those fun and confusing short versions of long explanations or titles. Like CEO - which I still never really get right - is it Chief Executive Officer? or Chief Educational Organizer? or both? I think I must be a CEO - if it is the latter description. Anyway, the conversation we had that day was something around the same sort of confusion. "Mom, what does blah blah blah mean." and I said something inspired that made them happy and content with the world because they knew their mom knew EVERYTHING.

For you Newer Moms - That Is The Way You Want It - You Want Your Children To Believe You Know Everything!! Even more then their dad - but let the kids think Dad knows EVERYTHING there is to know about things you aren't interested in doing. Like for me - that would include putting together the game, Mouse Trap (hate that thing!) and any of those robots that turn into cars or monsters - oh, Transformers (hate those too) and how to put together train tracks (only because then they tear them up and that drives me insane).

But that is not what I found Damn Funny - the acronym thing ties in - but the New Mom Tips don't. Here is the funny - and know that the following content may not be advised for small children (or children you don't want to explain sex things to). So I will rate this PG-16 - although unfortunately I believe 13 year olds already understand these acronyms. Now - there are 2 school districts in our area (you will need that info later).


I am in the car coming home from Michael's (unneeded info, but now you have a mental picture - know too that I am happy, just spent almost an hour browsing for nothing and being bothered by no one - aaahhh....). I am listening to the new tape (ooops, dated myself - CD - that I just bought at Target - Target rocks!). I am totally by myself so my mind is Able to Wander. I am sitting at a light waiting to turn left (more not needed info). There is a Gigantic SUV in front of me. So I am totally noticing the back end because it is taking up all the space in my view. Wonder if that lady off roads in her gargantuan SUV? Wonder if she camps and needs the space for her tent? Wonder if she uses the SUV for anything other then loading it up with crap she buys? With cars like that sucking up gas how can our economy be suffering? I digress............so I am looking at the backend of her car. Oh, I see a bumper sticker. It says in blue letter with a white border on a blue background - BJHS - simple and to the point - they are in one school district (not ours). It is the acronym of a local Junior High School. I think about the fact the BJ is unfortunate. Who wants to go to a school that can easily be called Blow Job High School? Made me think of the story I heard about why in our district the schools are also still called Jr. Highs - because one of their names starts with a P - a middle school would have made the acronym PMS - PreMenstral School - no one wanted that so it is PJHS. Not bad - probably less teasing then PMS. Poor BJ. Bet the boys at BJ love the name once they figure out the joke though. I can hear the jokes........boys are dumb. Then I think maybe their district should change the name of Jr. Highs to Middle School to avoid the BJ acronym - hmmm.............maybe I should write them a letter about my brilliant idea........oh wait....that would make them BMS. Wonder which is worse - Bowel Movement School or Blow Job High School?

Hope my kids never ask me about those acronyms.

Perhaps I shouldn't be given time to have Free Thinking.......

Happy St. Patricks Day!!!

Luck Be With Ya All Day Long!!!

Tears, Pancakes, Helicopters, Small Planes, Large Planes, BigGuy & Quarters........

This morning (you are probably reading this yesterday) BigGuy went on a business trip. He has done this before. However, he has never flown on a plane while doing this. He has generally driven. Sometimes he is gone for 2 days, once he was in training for almost a week, but usually his trips are simple overnight kinda deals. We have never seen him off at the airport. Not for anything now that I am thinking about it. Although SuperStar has had us thinking about it for at least 2 days. Tearfully she has gone on and on about how much she will miss BigGuy.

Why oh why oh why oh why does Daddy have to go????????????? Why?????????? She says this in a way that would make you think BigGuy were never coming back - or that he was going to something terrible and he didn't want to go either. But he isn't. He will be back - probably sooner then he would want to be (although he does love us dearly - or so he professes). She literally worked up tears on and off for the entire day yesterday - worsened when I made her (yes, forcefully almost) get her hair cut to try to even out the bang whacking she gave herself 10 months ago - the crying only lessened when we let her pick the restaurant for dinner. BigGuy blames this drama on pre-pms stuff. Only that should be years off (please let it be years off). I blame this on......actually I have nothing to blame it on. But I do have a complaint to lodge:

Why doesn't anyone notice when I go on a trip and am gone for days? Where is the drama for the Mama? For the most part they hardly even notice when I arrive back home. What is up with that?



So to try to make the whole BigGuy Leaving for a horrible business trip to Sunny Florida seem more manageable for the kids - we took them to breakfast. There is a cute restaurant with Fabulous pancakes that has relocated right on the airport grounds. You can sit and watch the planes come in and out - well.......it is a smallish (yet impressive) airport - so really you don't see anything happen out the windows, but there is the promise of the possibility - and the pancakes are very good. The kids were excited - they even almost stopped crying (by this morning SuperStar had Spidey all upset too - in fact we ALL slept together last night - after SuperStar wept dramatically for at least 30 minutes).

At breakfast we got really lucky. There was a helicopter parked right outside the window. It was at least cool to look at - TheKing thought that was a humdinger cool thing - and then.......it started up half way through our meal and TOOK OFF!!



Right after that we watched a smaller plane tool around a bit - wait, that might have been right before we came in and then as we were leaving it pulled up just to the side of the window. That was cool too. So even though we didn't see any big planes take off - we saw a lot of little cool things. Well worth the meal - even though (through tears and stubborn behavior) we spent a fortune on food SuperStar talked us into a gigantic plate of breakfast food that she didn't eat.


The next adventure was getting BigGuy into the airport. Tiny airport (compared to those that I have been in - which are only major cities so far), but very nice. They had a nice check in area, two water fountains, a restaurant, a bakery, a little coffee stop, nice seating, sculptures depicting I am not sure what that the kids loved playing on - and lots of adults to look on at my pathetic children weeping endlessly as BigGuy took his shoes off and passed through the security area that we were not allowed to go into. The sobbing - the hands on the glass - the "what if he never comes back" questions - the "why can't we go in there too?" - and the chasing of TheKing back away from the security area. I tried to talk everyone into settling in where we could watch the plane taxi out and take off. Nope - not enough drama in that........we have to be in the center crying and wailing and crying....BigGuy really did miss a performance in his honor.

I tried to take it all in stride. Yep, they sure love him. SuperStar even stopped her weeping for a moment to assure me she had done this for me when she was 4 and I went for a weekend with my friends to a MOMS Club convention in MN. No she didn't - 2 friends left their kiddo's with BigGuy that morning, as soon as those kids showed up SuperStar was gone - I don't even think she noticed we left. But....it was nice of her to try to fake it for me. Kinda.

Eventually they all got bored with milling around waiting for nothing to happen. Because where we were NOTHING was going to happen. So I asked if they wanted to drive around to the plane tower and park and watch the plane leave. No, they wanted to go home and get a movie. What??? Daddy isn't even off the ground yet - you have been crying for days - you don't want to watch the plane take off??? The response was, "No, it is too sad. Can we toss a coin in the waterfall?"


I was stunned, relieved and suddenly very ready to go. "Nope, no coin in the water. I only have quarters." thinking that she had already spent a ton of money at breakfast that we threw away. There were people really close watching the drama though - so I thought it best of me not to look petty. However, SuperStar got me....she stopped right next to a group of older people, they were smiling at us and listening in...."But Mommy I want to throw the coin in to wish that Daddy's plane doesn't crash and he doesn't die. Isn't that worth a quarter to you?"

Crap. "Sure, here is a quarter." Handing everyone a quarter. Crap. The older people smiled at me. We made out way to the water fountains and then to the car - finally!!!

The only thing is - I wanted to see the plane take off - I wanted to wave to my sweetie and think happy thoughts about him. And all of a sudden - the weeping started again. Everyone buckled and the crying began from SuperStar - carried over to Spidey (know now that this is all very manufactured). TheKing began.

"What will we do without Daddy for 3 days?"
"Same stuff." was my answer, "It is ONLY 3 days after all."
"But it might as well be 3 years to me." was the pitiful answer in back.

I fully expected that if we didn't leave soon this was what would happen.....



So we left. Funny thing.........no one wanted to sit on the back porch and watch for the plane to fly over with me. The boys came out - got on the trampoline - kept asking me to watch them.....I totally missed the plane.

As Serious Like a Heart Attack

Pretty sure that a few posts ago I talked about SuperStars big sales. Just in case - and because she loves to read it - she sold 759 boxes!! Seriously. This is what her stack of cookies looked like after we unloaded them in our garage. You can't even see all the stuff because of the massive amount of Thin Mint cases - yeesh you Thin Mint lovers are crazy for that stuff!! Although with the Lemonades stacked in front it certainly looks like I am talking some folks into my favorite :0) I don't even know how many cases there were in all - my co-leader would - she took the job of Cookie Mom (although this year I helped a lot more due to some family stuff she really wanted to go home for). I will happily give the job back to her 100% next year.


I know - you are thinking, "Damn!! That's a lot of cookies!" and you are right. But look at the next picture...........



These are OUR VERY OWN COOKIES - they aren't being held (oh, wait 3 boxes go to Sunny's family and 2 to my neice) for anyone other then US!! The kids each bought 4 boxes (The King excluded - he gets to pilfer all of ours), not sure how many BigGuy asked for and I wanted 2 Lemonades and 2 Peanut Butter Sandwich (not Patties - yeck to the chocolate). Then Nanny and GranmaR bought - AND GAVE THEM TO US! Had we known that was going to happen we would have bought Many Less. We should have known though. Perhaps it is a subconscious thing.

Now........to make us feel better about the amount of cookies we bought. I am noticing that many of those friends and family who just bought a few boxes because they really shouldn't........are coming back for MORE! HA! Now our 40 boxes doesn't seem so gluttonous - well, it still does.......kinda...they are Girl Scout cookies after all........and they only come once a year..........

Spidey's Music Concert

Spidey had a music concert recently - we were able to snag decent seats so that I could video tape some of it. After missing SuperStars we tried harder. Only, see, we have this little family member that CAN NOT SIT STILL during these performances. The King can make it very difficult not only to SEE the show, but also to enjoy it. You don't see the show like we do. You see either the still pictures we manage or videos like these. This time around I also did a video that vaguely shows what we see at the show.

What you see from the video we take -

What we experience while watching the show -


Regardless of what we experience - Spidey really loved entertaining. He is begging to be a Famous Actor (keep in mind he doesn't want to be an actor that Isn't Famous).

We Should Have Seen it Coming

Still...............we were taken by surprise.

Funny that last month I was blogging about White Privilege, what it means, how we should be more comfortable accepting one another and not dismissing the race or color we are to make everyone more equal. Rather to embrace and acknowledge what is different about each of us - race, ethnicity, gender - because each of these factors makes up who we are. Most importantly to be comfortable talking about it all - being able to talk about it is what will ultimately help us become comfortable discussing racism and continue to build those bridges. Doing all this knowing full well that there will be hurdles within our own family to get across - comfortably - delicately - outwardly. Thinking there might be a bit more time though.

Wrong Again!!

On our trip to STL this past weekend we spent A LOT of time together in the car - BigGuy, Spidey, SuperStar and The King (formerly known as Babers). We left the house at 7am - hit GranmaR's - hit Nanny's and as we were headed to Papa's house The King made a very matter of fact type statement - "I am black". No one was talking about color so we thought he said something else maybe - "what did you say?" we asked, "something is on your back?" - keep in mind his speech is not that clear, the radio was going and I think Spidey was actually talking at the time. "No, I am black." he repeated again. "You are black?" we repeated to which he said, "Daddy is white."

Oh. I felt a bit like SuperStar and Spidey must have felt a few weeks before when BigGuy and I were pushing to talk about sex. Now? Here? What do the books say to do? Hmmm................

My response was to show him something that was black and show him that really he is a brown color. Wondering why he would identify himself with the term black and us with white. Probably a knee jerk reaction - not wanting to divide our family into black/white, but true colors. I have no idea why I would want this, but I did. Spidey was in the back seat claiming to not be white, but really be a pinkish color - well, not pink because that is girls but like a tan..........he was happily rambling about his color. Then Spidey told The King that he isn't black he is brown. The King told SuperStar she was White. SuperStar told The King that he shouldn't make fun of people and their color, that he could hurt their feelings. I was wondering who told The King he was black - or did he come up with it himself. There were a ton of things happening at once -

Then I flashed back to the kitchen a few weeks before. It was a Friday afternoon - BigGuy and I were with The King at lunch time - Jake and Sunny (our dogs) were running in from outside milling around The King at the table to see if it was peanut butter again - and The King said, "Jake is black and Sunny is white." BigGuy and I agreed - then looked at each other and I said, "That is interesting." Knowing he was starting to make the connection of things being the same, but different.

Back to the car - we had 5 things happening at once.
* SuperStar was telling people that to talk about another persons color is wrong.
* The King is making connections about race and his being different.
* Spidey is trying to teach The King what shade of brown he is.
* BigGuy is driving and not helping me (or so I saw it)
* I am wondering how far to take the conversation at the moment.

The only person I really addressed was SuperStar. We talked - very shortly - about how it is perfectly fine to talk about another persons race or color as long as it is done in a positive and genuine way. If you are saying it with the intent of pointing out that there is something wrong then it is not nice and she would be right. However, the way The King was doing it - very matter of fact - he was okay, he was learning and looking for feedback about what he is noticing about his family. She looked okay, but checked out of the conversation. Spidey had run his information sharing into the ground and went back to looking out the window. The King had made his announcement and he was done. BigGuy and I just kinda looked at each other and said, "That was interesting." And I made a mental note to come back to it later. Thinking about it pretty much every day since it happened on Saturday.

This morning The King told me he was black again. I mentioned that I think he is a beautiful warm brown. He said I was white. I agreed, but that I was a tannish color too. He then said he was like chocolate. Yummy chocolate. Cold Chocolate and he said "brrrr". I hugged him and said I would make him Warm Chocolate. He said I was White Chocolate and ran his finger across me and pretended to lick his finger making a slurping noise and said, "Yummy". So I did the same.

One step at a time.....

Family Secret - by Spidey

It is Young Authors time again. This year Spidey has written his first book - very exicting. He wasn't very "into" it until the cover and spiral were on it. Then he became quite proud.

With no further waiting we present "Family Secret" - autographed copies can be purchased for a nominal fee......





There was a boy named Ben. He was at school. He was the Cool kid. Everybody liked him except a girl named Lucy. Lucy thought he was a Show Off. She was right - a little bit. Ben thought there was something weird about himself. He iddn't know what it was.



Ben went home from school one day. His dad showed him a picture and it was really really old and it was really really gray and dusty. The picture was of his dad. Usually his friend's dad's pictures were not that old and dusty. And then he found a picture of his dad from way long ago standing in front of a mud cabin. And what was really weird was the rest of his family was in it too. This made Ben think his dad and his family was somehow from the past.



Then the next morning Ben went to school. He told his friends that he thinks his family might be from the past. They said no way that was not possible. So Ben went home and into his backyard. His dad was destroying all the beds and his mom was building mud beds.
Ben said,"What are you doing?"
His mom said, "Don't worry honey I am building you guys a new bed."
Then his sister came and said, "Drrr....what would you think Mom would do?"
Then Ben went into his room and got the pictures of his family from the past. He ran to his friends house and then destroyed the pictures. Then something magical happened. Two portals appeared. One was lead to the Past and on lead to the Future. Ben didn't know where the portals lead so he chose one. It led to the past. Then without notice a Red Goblin came out of the portal to the Future. Then 99 more came out.



As Ben went through the past he found his dads home. Then he found his families neighbor who surprised him when he shouted, "Howdy you all what's up?"
Ben said, "What is that all about?" and jumped out of the past and all the way into the future. He landed in an old ladies house. There were robot servants and people with floating bubbles for cars. Then he went to his house in the future. He was himself when he was bigger. He was hiw wife, his son,his father and even his mom. His sister and brother were there too. His dog and his friend were there. His uncle was there and his aunt and his cousins. His house was really really really huge big.



Then he decided to go out of the future and he saw 100 Red Goblins coming out of the portal from the past. Ben went to the museum to find a Gold Diamond. The Golden Diamond was going to give him powers. he knew this because a voice told him. The voice was his dad's, but his dad wasn't there. It was really weird.
Ben said, "What is happening to me?" as he reached the museum.
He told the museum guard at the door, "I need the Gold Diamond."
The museum guard said, "No! Hands off!"
That night he snuck into the museum when no one was there. Ben got the Golden Diamond. He destroyed it by dropping it on the ground and a mist came up out of the diamond that went into his body and gave him Strength, Invisibility, Water Powers, Laser Eyes and he could fly.



Once Ben had all his powers he flew to the middle of the world. Then he started to fight the Red Goblins.
He said, "Take that you dirty monsters! Take that!" and he fought the Red Goblins with his new strengths.
Soldiers came to fight with Ben, but they were scared and ran away. One stayed there and got hurt. Ben saved him by throwing the soldier into the air and landing him in his house. Ben fought the Red Goblins for six hours. Finally they were all defeated.
Ben then found that his powers were all gone. He ran home to his father and shouted, "Admit to the world that you are from the past!" His father admitted that they were. They hugged and everyone in the whole world had a party.

Seen In Someone Else's Art Work

There are days when you look at your kids and you just think, "I am going to go insane if I see you for a second more." Certainly you don't feel like a fabulous parent - but those days DO HAPPEN.

At the same time - there are days when you look up at your kids and you think, "How could God have created anything more beautiful then you." and of course you maybe feel a bit full of yourself because you KNOW there is not another family of children that could EVER hold a candle to yours.

Lately - Babers, soon to be renamed "The King", has been more then a handful. He almost demolished my birthday splendor into a pile of rubble - had it not been for the 30 minute foot & back massage the Olders gave me. Then today I pulled up the link for the pics taken at his preschool. The photographer, JennyLein, did an amazing job!! She is quite the Artist. I am totally buying pictures - and that is saying something! He is Gorgeous! She captured his beauty, his spunk and his "you want to do anything I ask" for ability.





How Lucky Am I?

Now I want to take the Olders back to have her do the same for them. Could save a life - you just never know.

Happy Birthday To Me!!

Today is my Birthday - Yea Me!! I didn't make these Bday cupcakes - I found then in a google search - I might make them though - they are super cute! However, for my birthday today I think I will either have BigGuy's famous Carrot Cake - or go to a local bakery and get a Cheesecake. Hmmm....birthday choices.

Anyway, to do a post that Celebrates Me and share a funny - I was trying to think of something fun to post that would make people giggle. Now..........you may have already seen this. My first time was on CNN about a week ago. If so - you already know the giggle. If not - enjoy!

Just click the Link below and it will take you to the Movie Trailer for Mel Gibson's newest movie 'The Colonel'

MEL GIBSON IS… COLONEL SANDERS

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Let's Talk about Sex

So the time has come. Our kids are whispering about sex. Well........not exactly "whispering" - if they had been whispering I might not have heard it. They were outright having a conversation and not realizing that while sitting in the next room I could hear what they were up to. Silly kids - when ARE they going to Learn?

This is how it went.............
Spidey, "rambling on about butt stink or something............."
SuperStar, "totally pretending to be grossed out about butt stink conversation........"
Spidey, "I know what sex means."
SuperStar, "No you don't." Then ignoring him.
Spidey, "Yes, I do Susie (name has been changed for obvious reasons) told me that sex is where........muffled voice continues."
SuperStar, "That is not what sex is." Goes back to ignoring him.
Spidey, "Yes it is Susie knows things." Goes back to watching TV. Conversation ends.

I sit there stunned that my first grader has any interest in what sex means - let along that he appears to have a definition. So I wait - so as not to alarm him - and then a few minutes later call him into the room I am in.

He stands before me looking like I am about to assign him the task of cleaning his room - which he totally DOES NOT WANT. Instead I surprise him by saying.....

"Ah, I heard you tell SuperStar that you know what the word sex means."
Spidey immediately ducks his head down and looks like he is going to puke. Shakes his head "no" like I misunderstood what I heard.
"Dude I know I heard you say Susie told you what sex is. I would like to know what you and Susie know. You are not going to get in trouble."
Spidey looks up and rolls his eyes in reluctance, "Well, Susie says that sex is where one person sucks on another persons privates."

This is where I now duck my head and look like I am going to puke. Trying to recover and look "normal" I say, "Well...........that is one definition of an act of sex. There are many more ways the word can be used. Like for instance - you are a boy and that is you "sex". SuperStar is a girl and that is her "sex"." In my head thinking - where am I going with this. However, this seems to be more then enough for Spidey as I notice he is backing away toward the door. Stopping him I mention that BigGuy will want to sit down and talk more about sex with him. Spidey stops and says, "Oh no, I don't need to know anymore."
I assure him we should get some definitions straight so that he isn't guessing about things. However, Spidey wants nothing to do with talking to BigGuy and asks to speak to me. Ugh. I tell him we will sit down all together later. He leaves very quietly.

Then I am thinking..............."So what is SuperStars definition?" And Crap! Crap! Crap!

Later in the afternoon BigGuy comes home with flowers for everyone. See - the kids are home sick. The thought that I could have avoided this whole topic by just sending my kids to school sick does not escape me. They may NEVER have another sick day in their lives. BigGuy is told about the morning conversations. SuperStar walks in and hears - and tries to back out of the room as quickly as she arrived. We stop her and ask her what Her definition of "sex" is.

SuperStar says, "Sex is when two people take their clothes off and lay in bed together naked. Then they crawl all over each other."

BigGuy now looks like he is going to puke. I am now ready for this sort of thing and say, "Well..........that is one definition of sex." and then go into the same speech you read earlier. Then BigGuy adds that we should all sit down and talk about it this weekend - to which SuperStar adamantly says, "No, no no, I am way too young to know much more about this stuff." and tries to back out of the room.

We catch her and assure her we will be having this conversation - that there are other kids who are learning about this and we want her to have the right answers so that she isn't making her own assumptions about what things are. Knowing the truth will help her sort through the things she will be hearing from others. We also tell her that anything we talk about is between us - not to talk to other kids in school until the school has a conversation in the class (which it appears is next year). She ASSURES us No One is talking about it that she knows.

Lies, lies, lies!!!!! Does she think we just fell off a turnip truck??

So we let it all sit. We tell both the kids that we want them to think about any questions relating to their bodies or the topic of sex so that we can talk about them that weekend.

They never bring it up.

We all get in the truck for a ride to STL (3 hours captive in the car with the parents). As we are about 30 minutes in we say, "So...........who wants to talk about sex?"

Both the kids feign sleeping.

Now, isn't it supposed to be the other way around? Aren't the parents supposed to be afraid to talk about sex with the kids? What is this about? Some sort of reverse psychology?